Get thee hence...

Temptation has presented itself very strongly and suddenly in my life. There is a new battle being fought, and it is one against someone who doesn't want me going to the Temple to be endowed. Here, I would love to share what I know to be true, to prove to that malicious being that I will reach my greatest strength and potential, I will not falter, I will not fail, for God is on my side. I would like to start by quoting a beautiful talk called "Celestial Marriage" by Elder Bruce R. McConkie. He defines marriage in a nutshell saying, "Everything that we do in the Church is connected and associated with and tied into the eternal order of matrimony that God has ordained. Everything that we do from the time that we become accountable, through all our experiences, and all the counsel and direction we receive, up to the time of marriage, is designed and intended to prepare us to enter into a probationary marriage arrangement, one that does in fact become eternal if we abide in the covenant made in connection with that order of matrimony. Then everything that we do for the remainder of our lives, whatsoever it may be, ties back into the celestial order of matrimony into which we have entered and is designed and intended to encourage us to keep the covenant made in holy places. That is the general concept, briefly stated, under which we are operating." I LOVE that this righteous man states that marriage is what we all strive for, it is what we are all being prepared for and it is what we will continue to prepare for until we find that spouse destined for us. I reaffirm that everything after marriage will tie back to the celestial order of things. I believe that our Heavenly Father sent us here to reside in a family to prepare to create our own family and continue His eternal plan. We enter into a covenant when we become endowed in the Lord's temple, and as well when we are sealed to our family, and the Lord says: "All covenants, contracts, bonds, obligations, oaths, vows, performances, connections, associations, or expectations, that are not made and entered into and sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise, of him who is anointed, both as well for time and for all eternity, and that too most holy, by revelation and commandment through the medium of mine anointed, whom I have appointed on the earth to hold this power (and I have appointed unto my servant Joseph to hold this power in the last days, and there is never but one on the earth at a time on whom this power and the keys of this priesthood are conferred), are of no efficacy, virtue, or force in and after the resurrection from the dead; for all contracts that are not made unto this end have an end when men are dead." (Doctrine and Covenants 132:7) The Lord knows what is bound in his kingdom, He knows what is sealed temporally and what has been sealed eternally. I am so grateful to have the honor of being endowed and then later sealed in His Temple, there is no greater feeling of fulfillment than that of fulfilling the Lord's commandments. I am thrilled to be born again, born into a new inheritance, into a new family with my future husband-to-be. I hope and pray that we can continually stay true to our covenants, as we prepare in this life to join our Father again. I say these things in the name of the Savior Jesus Christ, Amen.

New Boundaries...

I've discovered my love for design once again. Have you ever noticed that you go in and out of phases in your life without even realizing that you just went through a phase? Makes sense, right? Anywho, I just rediscovered my love for design.... for art... and for anything beautiful really. I forgot how refreshing it was to go out and just photograph the world around you. Finding patterns, shapes, and aligning your lens with the proportions of the world. Little did I know that this was a remedy for the soul. My passion for reading has also resurfaced. "You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me." -C.S. Lewis. There is a certain pleasure in reading I could never find anywhere else. Nothing can take me out of this world better than a book, and when one wants to escape, reading presents itself proudly. This is excellent timing for books to come into my eager perspective again because of school starting up soon. I am anxious about entering a new design program that I'm not at all used to, but I believe that my anxiety will settle once I get in learning mode once again. Lately I've discovered that there are things about myself that I cannot change. For instance, I'll always be a brunette, my eyes will continually stay blue, and most importantly I'm an independent being. I will forever want to take care of myself, and sometimes this is the worst possible mindset... Especially when you are expected to join lives with your one and only love of your life. There is a whole new ball game to be played when you fall in love, it's something I've not come across yet. I guess there is always room for something new... Yours truly...

So there's this guy...

I almost never talk about myself, and when I do it's typically through a loophole or some alternate meaning within a poem or something, but I think I'm going to try something new.. And what better way to start talking about yourself than to talk about someone else?! So there really is this guy... He makes my world pop. That's a strange phrase, and makes no sense unless you are a girl like me. Because he and I, we're made for each other and no one else. We click, pop, snap and work together. No matter the verb, it's what we do! (pun intended) I love him oh so much. This is not a typical thing I say in any public way. I'm planning on changing that. Mostly because I have this sparkly thing hanging out on my finger that's basically telling the world anyway. Oh golly gee, guys. He cares for me, and would do nothing to hurt me. I hope that every little princess has the opportunity to experience love like this in their life time. Everyone should have someone to live for. It really is a beautiful thing, and it will distract you from yourself. That's one thing I've noticed since loving the man of my dreams. I haven't kept my own dreams intact because of this beautiful distraction. And that... That is a frustrating thing. You never want to lose yourself, you'll have nothing left if you do, and when you have nothing left then you leave the love of your life with nothing left to love. That is your primary act of service in a relationship. Soooo... Be yourself. My self consists of reading, eating, loving the gospel, and loving people enough to kiss their face. I also have a tenancy to act like a little kid. This has nothing to do with wearing a diaper and throwing fits in the middle of Kmart, and everything to do with the way I love to live life a little more interestingly than others. I find no point in being bored, and find more point in dancing in the rain or scrunching up your neighbor's pants in the middle of sacrament just to make him have to put it down again. I hope I always have a zest for life like little children do, even when I'm ninety. Well, that's enough for today...

A World of Photography

Gothic Library

Here is my first complete room, matted and displayed for the end of my first semester of my Drawing and Presentation class. This living room's setting is in the Gothic Era, with Gothic styled furniture and contains aspects that would be present in the Gothic cathedrals, like the drapery and stylized clerestory look above the bookshelves. My references used were mostly from the inside of said cathedrals during the Gothic age, and my goal was to create the feel of a Gothic atmosphere in the room as well.

Being Constructive...

A construction drawing is what us Interior Designers learn to make sure we know how to see something in 360 degrees. So if I see a picture of a chair or sofa I would like to place in a room but it isn't in the right perspective, or I can't see the whole of a piece of furniture, I can transfer that image to the perspective I wish it to be by using the skills I've learned while doing construction drawings. This is my favorite construction drawing I have done so far! I'm not a violent person, but I REALLY loved drawing this gun.

Line Design

This project was a bit of a challenge, I was instructed to not use outlines to draw this rose laying on piano keys, but instead to use line weight and direction to recreate the image. I placed this photo in Photoshop and laid a red layer over the photo to bring out the feeling of the rose.

Got Curves?

Using line and shape on a designated format I chose to create a design by hand, breaking up the space and making it visually appealing. Here, I especially made sure that I had a focal point to draw the eye in.

Proportionally Pleasing

This is my first design created totally on Adobe Illustrator. The project was to make an interesting design using line and shape and then repeat it to display scale and proportion. Making the design pleasing to the eyes. This can be applied to designing a room, to make the aesthetic and functional requirements for a room.
There was another version of this pattern where I repeated the design hundreds of times, making a tie pattern look. This textured look could be applied to designing fabrics in the future if the Interior Designer (me) sees fit.

Here I begin my designs, this isn't my first board layout, but it is my best for my first year in the BYUI ID program. This dining room design was to be designed by and for an artist, the artist I chose was Mark Rothko, mostly because of his elaborate use of color. I tried to balance color and shape to create a rhythm in the room, and to stimulate conversation around the dinner table. The art pieces are by Rothko himself, we have a mix between modern and a sort of arts and crafts feel mixed to complete this room. The paint brushes are a trinket used to make the board layout a bit exciting and to sell the design to the artist client.

Are You Hungry?

"The Hunger Games" series is unlike any other, a mixture of dramatic romance, mysterious political crime and survival of the fittest. When reading the book you are captured by Katniss Everdeen and her will to take care of herself and her family, you learn where her priorities in life stand when you see her merely hunt and trade with people in her District, District 12. You see, there are Districts beneath the all powerful anarchy of the Capitol. Every district is limited by the Capitol, and at the expense of those districts the people of the Capitol get their gain. Therefore, Katniss and her hunting partner Gale provide for themselves by breaking rules and going out to get there own gain in the forbidden forests surrounding their district.
The Capitol has an annual tradition of taking two tributes from every district, randomly chosen, and putting them in a arena to fight to the death. This is for entertainment, and ultimately to remind all the districts that they are not in control of there own lives, and to encourage them to rely only on the Capitol, or be punished.
The movie and book capture you in the intensity of rebellion against the Capitol and Districts. There is an unsettling feeling that something is wrong with the government here. So when it is Katniss and the baker's boy Peeta who are the tributes from District 12 this particular Hunger Games you know there will be ultimate changes to take part.
The character who plays Katniss in the 2012 film is breathtakingly beautiful, and in all reality a perfect match. She's brave and yet sentimental, and plays the part of a subtle rebel very well. But Peeta, ahhh Peeta, he is a masterpiece in the book and not quite right in the production. You see, he becomes the voice of the rebellion with his wit and charm with the crowd, and its apparent right away in the book, but the movie shrugs off that aspect and instead portrays him as just a boy who is in love with Katniss. (and even that isn't played to the fullest)
The book is more political than a romantic story, Peeta is a perfect example of what a brave citizen under immoral rule would react. He uses word to persuade the people of the importance of a rebellion, he encourages and uplifts Katniss, though she neglects his wise counsel, and he faces the harshest of penalties in the end. Something even Katniss wouldn't survive. I believe the movie surpassed his greatness which is unfortunate. In fact, by not including certain dialogue in the movie that was in the book, it leaves the audience confused about a lot of the characters, therefore making it less appealing.
Leaving that negativity behind, there is a very positive aspect of this film, and that is the "feel" of the movie itself. It's as if we've rewound to the depression, or perhaps fast forwarded to the future of a demolished government. There is a sorrow in the scenes, a feeling that something corrupt is happening with no way of stopping it. The Hunger Games themselves, with silence in the woods and ruthless killings by haunting children, are spectacularly medieval. Katniss takes you along her side as she survives, you jump when she jumps, you're running as she is running, you feel the fear of the moment as she is hiding from the brutal contestants hunting her down. That is something I've never had happen to be in a movie, something that only a book has had the effect on my mind so far. You get into her head and begin to think like she does when she does. Of course, I may be bias because I know what she was thinking because I had read the book, but it was incredible from my standpoint.
I expect the trilogy to be a success at the end of all the films, just as the books have been. But I would definitely recommend the book before viewing the movie or you won't be able to make sense of it all unfortunately.

I Like to Paint...

2011 Loosening of Foot

Directed by: Craig Brewer

A movie that will fire up your dancing feet, make you groove to the beat, and take you back to your first and only love. Compared to the 1984 version of Footloose, this enhanced version is updated with the most recent comic wit, dance styles, and music to help this new generation to understand this classic masterpiece. Footloose invites you to this small town that's been tainted with a tragic past, and is reliving it day after day with the ridiculous laws they enforced because of the death of the town reverend's son. Dancing is illegal along with any music the town counsel deems inappropriate or too loud.

Amid all the illegal partying and fun the youth main characters have in this movie in order to hold the viewers attention, there is a underlying meaning that rings true. Ren MacCormack, an outsider who moves into the town, takes initiative to abolish the laws that prevent everyone from expressing themselves through dance and always being reminded of the loss of a loved one. Ren spends the time to study the laws of church and state, the separation between the two, and how the people in a society should have the freedom to dance, sing and praise when and where they personally see fit. This film reminds viewers that everyone has a choice and voice in governmental situations, and the rights of humanity stand true in any situation, whether it be to able to put on a town dance or having the right to marry whomever you please.

The characters are brilliantly portrayed, from the reverend's daughter going through a identity crisis to Willard the high school comedian with redneck blood flowing strongly through his veins. There are big shoes to fill when remaking a classic film, and this 2011 reproduction of Footloose did an excellent job, if not a better one.

Life Is a Dream

Playwright: Pedro Calderon de la Barca

Performed by: BYU Idaho theater students

Here's a story that can be summed up in a very short synopsis. There's a locked up prince who has anger issues, a neglecting father who somehow found a way to become king, a guard who apparently sleeps around and therefore doesn't know where any of his reproductions are, and a girl who insists on being a man. They all run around the castle dealing with love triangles, murder, and never really talking about the people they govern, too absorbed in their own lives to care. Even the battle at the end is for their own personal gain, to bring the prince out of imprisonment to rule the people. Remember, this prince with anger problems, who is a murderer, and knows nothing about ruling a kingdom? Yes, that man is who they want to free and bring to the throne. A man with no training, no knowledge of government, who is practically a beast who's been locked away his whole life and suddenly who is able to rule the land. Wouldn't be my first choice I'll tell you that.

The actors were definitely not professional, but were able to express the intensity of the play. They yelled a lot, which was only justified when the imprisoned prince would have his outbursts for of course he didn't have any social ques. But when emphasis is needed within a play it does not always mean you have to shout to emphasize, for even when you lower your voice it invites the audience to listen even more carefully, entrapping them in their humanity.

Now that I've gotten out all of my negativity about the play out in the open, I suppose it's time to express what I really enjoyed about the play. Though it was performed distastefully, besides the comic relief, the writing was quite magnificent. Introducing an ultimate question, is life a dream? What is real and what is make believe? The prince is faced with this struggle of knowing if he is a true heir of the throne, or a dreamer trapped in prison. Once he defeats the king and takes his place at the throne he still states that he may be dreaming, but he would enjoy it while it lasts. Saying that all happiness ends at one point, so you might as well savor it while it is in your grasp. Some may say that this is a very cynical outlook on life, I'd say that it sums up the hills and valleys we as mere mortals have to endure in existence.

Overall, good message though its cynical, but too prolonged and poorly performed for only one good message.

Dear Fairytale,

Don't you find it a little weird that a woman would sit so willingly in a tower? And if that wasn't enough, you had to put in the ridiculous notion that she is waiting for a man to come get her? You obviously have not lived in the real world... Let me let you in on a little secret, things do not work out the way you have been "taling" them.

There are no knights (so bold as to rescue these princesses), there is no chivalry, they are dead. Frankly, its better without all of those faeux cliches. Men wear their realities in daylight now, not hidden by armor. True love's first kiss doesn't happen the first time around, it usually takes practice for most men to get it right. And lets face it, men aren't as handsome as

they used to be.

Us women should look at it as a blessing, really. Now we don't have to be so surpri

sed when we get conned into marrying one these men, we usually know what were getting into.

But now were faced with a problem. Women aren't willing to wait in a tower for their prince anymore, they've found that they can rescue themselves. And by doing that they find this independence that prevents them from depending on any man. Leaving men with two options, fight for a lost cause, or just live without trying to find the woman of their dreams. What could possibly be our solution?

This is the part where I have you break the bad news to you, my friend... You see, we (the real world) are going to have to let you go. You're of no help anymore, in fact you're actually hindering reality. As sweet and romantic you make your stories sound, they just aren't cutting it. They don't portray the truth of love. Love does not need to be proved by the breaking of any spell. It is proved by faithfulness, perseverance, willingness, and a kind heart. There is so much more to women than being in distress. We have as much of a right to save men as they have in saving us.

Sorry to let you go in such a harsh letter, I really wish we could have done this in person... But you insisted on written verses to be our only communication. May I suggest updating to the new generation? We are all advancing, how bout you hop on for the ride?

With regards,

Those who were stupid enough to think you would actually work out...

Broken Hearts Heal...

I'm not going to send this to you, not tonight. But it has to be said...

You are a coward. And I, I am brave. There is no question, I loved with no boundary.

You say there is no foundation where we stand, there is no grey area where we stood.

You would say anything to mask the truth, you gave up.

One being cannot control the love of two,

One being cannot control the sea as it crashes down on the sand.

I cannot chase away your memory, I'm not sitting in your fantasies anymore.

I say with full confidence that I won, I cannot regret anything I've said.

You cannot say the same, you lie on your own bed of lies.

No tune can suppress the pain I feel.

I wish we could be real, That I could breathe you in everyday.

Luckily, for me, wishes do not come true.

I was ready, there was no time to sit and doubt, we both felt something.

When life comes you pick it up and run with it, nothing should falter.

I could have given you the world, I would have if you let me.

I never wanted anything so much, you were my eternity.

And now you have vanished, faded into the spots of passing faces.

And I call you coward because I have that right.. As the one who let you in.

I am the one who took the chance.. I took it alone.

I stand tall, and face the storm that is my life. Living another day standing on my own.

There will be someone beside me, that day is not today, but he will come.

And he... He will deserve my love more than any other. He will heal me of this curse.

So sit in your regret, dear child... And know that someday you may find solace..

But also know that I found it first, I grasped the love more fully, I jumped..

And you, you are still sitting on the cliff face afraid of the fall..

As I am flying into the rising sun...